How To Stimulate Her G-Spot for MAXIMUM Pleasure

As men, we hear a lot of sex advice about hitting a woman’s G-spot.

There are all sorts of fingering techniques…

Tongue tricks…

And of course, advice for how to penetrate her during sex for maximum G-spot stimulation.

But what really works? And how can you give her a G-spot orgasm the fastest?

Hi, I’m sex expert Ruwando–and as part of my weekly series, I’m sharing my best pieces of advice to help you get physical with a woman the way you want–and in practically any situation.

So today, I want to show you exactly how to quickly & easily give a woman a G-spot orgasm.

Hey, Ruwando here. In this video I'm going to speak about the G-spot.

We've all heard of it:

It's a sensitive area of the woman's body… though sometimes, guys tend to have trouble finding it.

In my experience, the easiest way to find it is to feel it. Right above a woman's vagina, there's a bone there–that's called the pubic bone.

Women tend to have a more pronounced pubic bone than guys, which is part of the reason why her G-spot can be so sensitive.

So when you're inside her, the G-spot is going to be right around the area where her pubic bone is. You'll know you hit it when you feel a sponginess.

If you're facing a woman and you enter by pushing forward, you'll feel a little spongy area that feels a little bit different than the rest of her vagina.

Her vaginal walls will feel smoother than the G-spot. The G-spot feels like this spongy area.

If she's aroused (and hopefully she is if you're inside of her), you can feel the G-spot get a little swollen and a little more spongy.

And if she's a “squirter,” or if she gets very wet, with a little stimulation you might actually hear a sound that could be a precursor to her squirting.

So if you hear that, you know that's the G-spot.

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Now, as far as actually hitting her G-spot, just like any part of a woman's body you want to start more gently.

Then build up, because if she's not aroused enough for the amount of pressure you're giving her, it can be physically painful.

So now you know how to stimulate her G-spot during sex… but what about foreplay?

It's the same concept–go slow. I always recommend you go slow, because you never want to hurt her during or leading up to sex.

You may have heard of this technique before… it's kind of like the “come hither” motion while you finger her.

This kind of motion is great for stimulating a woman's G-spot.

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However, if you're only using your forearms, it can get really tiring. So here's an ergonomic technique I learned that helped me a lot:

If you're sitting with her, you can actually use your entire arm and back muscles, sort of like you're doing a lat raise. This alleviates pressure on your smaller muscles while still giving her the stimulation she craves.

Using the techniques I showed you, you can give just about any woman a G-spot orgasm…

But man, I dunno what kind of sex expert I’d be if I didn’t at least mention the “Deep Spot” Orgasm.

AKA the “Sexual Addictor,” this kind of orgasm is “like pure ecstasy, but better!!!” (According to the last girl I took home anyway haha).

It’s not as well-known as the G-spot orgasm, because a lot of guys assume you have to have some sort of “monster c**k” to pull it off… which is straight-up B.S.

(Not to get too graphic, but I’m no “monster” down there… so trust me, if I can do it so can you.)

But before I get ahead of myself… I’ve gotta give credit where credit is due: I first learned about the “Deep Spot” technique from my good buddy & tantric sex master, Lawrence Lanoff.

He showed me how to do it using this cool little video… and finally, he’s given me permission to share it with you (thanks Lawrence!):

Oral sex

Oral sex, sometimes referred to as oral intercourse, is sexual activity involving the stimulation of the genitalia of a person by another person using the mouth and the throat. Cunnilingus is oral sex performed on the vulva or vagina, while fellatio is oral sex performed on the penis. Anilingus, another form of oral sex, is oral stimulation of the anus. Oral stimulation of other parts of the body, such as by kissing or licking, is not considered oral sex.

5 Oral Sex Positions That Make It Easy for You to Have an Orgasm

No disrespect to penis-in-vagina intercourse, but penetration is not the easiest route to an orgasm for most women. What move is more likely to lead to an amazing O? Oral sex—receiving it, that is.
Research bears this out. In one 2016 study, nearly 70% of women described receiving oral as "very pleasurable." It's not hard to guess why. The direct clitoral stimulation oral offers is one benefit; a third of women said that they need this kind of touching to reach climax, according to a 2017 study from the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy.

Oral sex also results in extra wetness, and then there's the physical comfort of getting rather than giving. No wonder so many women love it—and why their partners love doing it. “Oral sex involves both indirect and direct clitoral stimulation,” says psychologist Megan Fleming, PhD, a sex therapist and marriage counselor in New York City.

While you might have a go-to position for enjoying oral, trying new poses can trigger more intense sensations and make you feel even sexier and more empowered. Here, Fleming suggests five to add to your bedroom rotation.

Reclining back on the bed
Lying on your back while your partner's head is between your legs is 100% about your pleasure; you can close your eyes and conjure up a fantasy, as well as hold your partner's head to feel more connected (or to steer him exactly where you want his mouth to go).
However, if you’re self-conscious about receiving and feel super exposed, Fleming suggests putting on a blindfold (or a sleep mask) when your partner goes down. “One, it helps you lose yourself more in the experience. Two, when you cut off your sense of sight, it heightens your other senses,” says Fleming. You may find that it feels even more intense, especially as your self-awareness slips away and you get lost in the moment.

Propped up by a pillow
“Good sex and oral sex are all about the angles,” says Fleming. “Certain positions give you more direct clitoral stimulation." Fleming recommends this simple way to switch up the angle and sensation: putting a pillow under your butt. That tilts your pelvis, giving your partner more access to your vulva, clitoris, and vagina. It may even be more comfortable for him too, so he can go on for as long as you want him to.

On all fours
Get into the doggy-style position and hover a few inches above your partner’s face, your legs either spread or tight together. “This allows you to move closer or further away and shift the sense of pressure you may feel from their tongue,” says Fleming. Essentially, you’re more in control. Plus, “it’s a great inner thigh workout, too,” she adds.

Classic 69
This one requires some technique, but the payoff is worth it, and it's thrilling to be able to pleasure your partner while he's pleasing you, says Fleming. The 69 position can be done in several different ways; the trick is to find a specific pose that works for you—such as 69 when you're both on your sides holding each other's legs, or 69 with one partner on top of the other.

Standing against a wall
Standing with your back pressed up against a wall (or standing and gripping a chair for support) can make you feel dominant and empowered, as your partner squats or rests on his knees below you. It can take time to get comfortable with this position, but it'll feel incredible as your partner grips your hips and butt for leverage and is surrounded by the sexiest parts of your body.

Have Great Sex… Even When You Don't Have an Orgasm

Donna Trope

Orgasms are elusive. Most women don't have one every time (or maybe even most times) they hit the sheets. Plenty of surveys—and likely your own bedroom experience—verify that. But that doesn't mean sex without the grand finale is an exercise in futility. Far from it.

In fact, on the occasions when you know you're just not going to climax or when you're just not motivated enough to strive for it, there are ways to simply enjoy the valleys without hitting the peak. Lots of women are discovering that it's smart to appreciate sex for more than just the last 10 seconds. So go ahead, don't get off—and love every minute of it.

Why Orgasms Go MIA
"For me to have an orgasm, I have to be feeling it before foreplay even starts," says Jamie*, 27, a newlywed in Doylestown, Pennsylvania. "I have to put in a lot of effort, and the stars have to align. But I feel satisfied knowing that my husband is satisfied every time." It's a situation that many women can relate to, and one backed by stats. According to research, women in relationships orgasm about 80 percent as often as men in relationships (for women in casual hookup situations, it's closer to 50 percent as often).

Researchers have coined this discrepancy "the orgasm gap" and have determined a few key factors for its existence. You probably don't need science to tell you that climaxing is tougher without clitoral stimulation, but you may not realize that overstimulation or the wrong kind of stimulation of your central nervous system, which controls sexual excitement and inhibition, is an orgasm killer. Stress or a poorly timed "Wait, why is the cat staring at us like that?" observation is all it takes to cause overstimulation—at least for women. (And speaking of stress: "Worrying about whether or not an orgasm will happen can activate your stress response, which can make you feel less turned on," says Emily Nagoski, Ph.D., a sex educator in Massachusetts.) Guys were blessed with evolution-aided blinders that make the cat (or annoying e-mail pings, a weird humming sound, whatever) nonfactors in the moment. "Men had to orgasm for the good of the species," says Laura Berman, Ph.D., author of The Passion Prescription. "That means their brains are primed to tune out all distractions. Women's aren't." (How come evolution is never on our side?)

How to Enjoy the Ride
What isn't reflected in these stats is the enjoyment some women derive just from the experience of having intercourse. "I rarely orgasm, and I don't care," says Jenna, 29, who is single in New York City. "I'm on anti-anxiety medication, and while it has definitely affected my ability to climax, it hasn't affected how much I enjoy sex."

That's not to say you should actively deny yourself an orgasm—that would be like stifling a sneeze, but worse—and if you've never had one and you want to have one, that's something you should discuss with your partner, says Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., author of Because It Feels Good.

But putting mid-act pressure on yourself every time could mean that you're missing out on pleasure in the moment. "Research shows that women can climb between sexual-desire stages, from excitement to plateau to orgasm, then back to excitement," says Berman. Focus too much on the end point and you'll end up brushing past the pleasing plateau. (Although it may sound flat, the plateau is actually when arousal is at its peak and your body is savoring your partner's touch the most—a pretty sweet place to linger.)

Play Close to the Edge
The key to a no-gasm experience that's anything but "eh" is to amp up your arousal early and stay there as long as possible. You'll know when you're there by the text test: If your phone buzzed, you'd be more annoyed by the interruption than curious who it was, says Stephen Snyder, M.D., an associate clinical professor of psychiatry at Mount Sinai School of Medicine. Heed these tips to enter a heightened state.

Don't get undressed. Leaving your clothes on helps take the focus off orgasm and keep it on foreplay. Get to maximum arousal by straddling his leg and grinding your pubic bone against his thigh as you make out, says sex educator Emily Morse, author of Hot Sex: Over 200 Things You Can Try Tonight. The pressure directly stimulates your clitoris while giving you total control of the rhythm.

Hit the shower. Getting wet and sudsy helps you find erogenous zones you may not have realized you had. Ask your guy to rub down your back and shoulders with a sponge, then have him switch to his bare hands as he moves to your breasts and works his way lower. "The different sensations of the water and the body wash, plus the anticipation of his hands on your skin after the sponge, will all add to your pleasure," says Morse.

Show off. "Part of a woman's pleasure during sex comes from feeling desired," says Snyder. Climb on top of him, lean over the bathroom counter as he enters you from behind, or put on a solo show and touch yourself: Watching him watch you provides an awesome view of how much he wants you.

Rewind. . .and ratchet up. If he has already climaxed, go back to the stuff you love during foreplay, only take it up a notch by adding a toy or playing with hot and cold sensations by having him use ice or warming lube as he touches you. "When you're turned on, your brain is open to new experiences, so situations that might have made you self-conscious when you weren't aroused can be extremely sexy," says Nagoski. If you start getting restless, or if the friction begins to veer more toward "ouch" than "OMG," have him give you a back rub or massage to transition toward ending the action so you don't feel like you stopped abruptly.

Expose yourself. Have sex with the windows open or get it on in the backyard under a blanket. The novelty can make it hard to concentrate on the climax. . .but that's because your brain is paying attention to the we-could-be-caught-at-any-moment thrill, which adds intensity to the encounter, says Morse.

Stop Faking It!
Ironically, it's guys who might end up most frustrated by your no-gasm. Eighty-seven percent of the Men's Health readers who answered our survey felt it was their responsibility to bring their partner to orgasm, and 34 percent automatically assumed that if it didn't happen, the sex was bad.

But don't brush up on your Oscar-worthy Orgasm face just yet. Every single sexologist we asked (three men and four women) were adamantly against faking it. "There's already a lot of confusion about sexual functioning and response between the sexes without adding deceit," says Richard Wagner, Ph.D., a Seattle-based sexologist. And guys agreed—in the poll, 68 percent didn't want you to fake it.

7 Sexualities You Should Know

In our modern world, there are many nuances and complexities when it comes to sexual orientation. Although some identify as gay or straight, others fall somewhere in the middle or completely outside of the spectrum. Who and how we love is complicated, however, there are more people out there with an orientation you may not be familiar with. Take a look at seven sexualities that fall under the LGBTQ+ umbrella in the gallery below, then let us know if you feel represented by one (or more) of these identities in the comments section on social media.

AsexualS

Someone who identifies as asexual experiences little to no sexual attraction to any genders. This is very different than being celibate, as celibacy is a conscious choice and asexuality is an identity many people have for the rest of their lives. Some asexual people do have sex and many engage in long term partnerships. Many asexual people have romantic attractions, as aromantic is an entirely separate sexual orientation.

Bicurious

Someone who identifies as bicurious is interested in having sexual experiences with members of their same sex. People who feel connected to this label may go on to adopt the term bisexual as they become more comfortable with their own identity. For others, they may realize that bisexuality isn’t for them and find themselves as straight allies to the queer community.

Demisexual

Someone who identifies as demisexual only experiences sexual attraction to someone they’ve formed an emotional connection with. For demisexual people, relationships are often formed through friendships and they feel sexual attraction based on the bonds they form with others. The romantic parallel to demisexual is demiromantic, an orientation where people only experience romantic attraction to someone they’ve formed an emotional connection with.

Fluid

Someone who identifies as sexuality fluid experiences shifts in their sexuality over time or depending on the situation. Fluid can be a great label for people who don’t feel represented by the traditional straight, gay or bisexual labels, as it’s tailored to the individual. Many people identify with gender fluidity as well, which means their gender identity changes over time.

Pansexual

Someone who identifies as pansexual experiences sexual attraction to people regardless of their gender, sex or sexuality. Pansexuality and bisexuality are often used interchangeably, especially as more bisexual communities have expanded the label to include those outside the binary. In fact, just last week Merriam-Webster updated the definition of bisexual to “of, relating to, or characterized by sexual or romantic attraction to people of one’s same sex and of the opposite sex” or “of, relating to, or characterized by sexual or romantic attraction to people of one’s own gender identity and of other gender identities.”

Queer

Someone who identifies as queer isn’t exclusively heterosexual. This is the label for people who don’t like labels, as it’s more based on an individual’s personal experiences and preferences. Queer was once used as a derogatory slur toward LGBT people, but it’s since been reclaimed by the community.

Sapiosexual

Someone who identifies as sapiosexual is attracted to a partner’s intellect over anything else. Although intelligence is a priority in most relationships, it’s number one for sapiosexuals. When it comes to sapiosexuality, it’s important to acknowledge that it’s intellect itself they find stimulating, not the status, fame or fortune that can come with it.

10 Ways to Naturally Increase Your Sex DriveMikolette

When your sex drive decreases, it’s easy to get freaked out. But the great news is that there are plenty of things you can do to naturally boost your sex drive. Better yet, you can do so without having to turn to supplements or weird “tricks.”

In my online sex therapy courses, I use what I call the Five Foundations model (Physical, Mental, Emotional, Sensual, and Relational) to help you evaluate your sex drive. All of these categories play huge roles in your sex drive. All of them touch on key issues in your life beyond the bedroom that can nevertheless affect your sex drive.

Here are 10 ways to increase your sex drive naturally.

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Exercise Regularly
Physical activity has been scientifically proven to increase your self-confidence, improve your body image, and rev up your sex drive. I know it can be challenging to start a regular exercise regimen, but what better motivation than increasing your libido? Aim for about an hourlong workout, three to five days per week. (And if you’re not already working out, even about 30 minutes a day will translate to results.)

Be careful not to overdo it though! In particular, an excessive amount of exercise can actually decrease your sex drive. High-intensity training for over an hour—like long runs—five or more times a week could have a negative impact on your sex drive, research suggests.

Get More Sleep
So many people get competitive about their sleep, claiming that they can function on just a few hours a night. Unfortunately for those people, sleep plays a huge role in your sex drive.

I always say that sex drive is a luxury for the body. If your body barely has the resources to function, it’s not going to divert any of those resources towards feeling desire. Aim to get seven to eight hours per night. Yes, seven to eight!

Decrease Stress
When you’re stressed, your body creates the hormone cortisol. Cortisol effectively decreases the amount of testosterone in the body, and as you probably know, testosterone is one of the most important hormones for male desire. It’s a direct relationship—the less testosterone you have, the less likely you are to feel desire.

Plus, stress puts your body in “fight or flight” mode. Excess stress triggers that “under attack” instinct, as your body’s nervous system tries to determine whether to stay and fight, or move fast to get out of trouble.

There’s no biological reason you should be feeling desire when your body thinks it’s under attack—so yes, stress will hurt your sex drive. There are lots of ways to decrease your stress levels, including exercise, getting more sleep, and mindfulness and meditation.

Evaluate Your Diet
People always ask me what supplements they should take to increase their sex drive. I think that’s the wrong question to ask. Your diet plays a much more fundamental role in changing your sex drive. You can’t eat Taco Bell every day, pop a few supplement pills, and expect to have the libido of a 16-year-old.
Entire books have been written about libido-boosting diets, but here are the simple rules I share with my clients:

Eat foods as close to their natural state as possible, as often as possible. (Limit processed foods.)
Eat whole-grain carbs. Minimize white carbs like white flour, white rice, and white potatoes.
Eat more veggies.
Eat less meat.
Drink plenty of water.
Don’t drink soda. (Even diet soda.)

Tackle Performance Issues
Performance issues are one of the most surprising causes of low libido. The men I work with rarely make the connection. It can be a vicious cycle: If you’re having troubles with your erection or your orgasmic timing, the stress and anxiety you may feel over that sexual performance can tank your sex drive. You may feel so self-conscious about not being able to perform that you may start avoiding sex altogether.

My suggestion: If you work with a sex therapist or an online course to conquer your performance issues, your libido will come roaring back, too.

Masturbate
A lot of men erroneously believe that masturbation will deplete your sex drive. The truth is, masturbation can help you feel even more desire. Of course, you don’t want to overdo it, but regular masturbation can help you feel more in touch with your desire. The more pleasure you experience, the more you’re naturally going to keep wanting that pleasure. If you feel that ejaculation decreases your energy or desire, try masturbating but not allowing yourself to orgasm. It can be a thrilling change of pace.

Exercise Your PC Muscles
Your PC muscles are one of the easiest ways to increase your sex drive. They are located in your pelvis, and drape from your pubic bone to your tailbone like a hammock. Exercising these muscles naturally helps you develop a better connection to your body, and think about your penis on a more regular basis. The exercises also help bring more blood flow to your genitals, which can also help increase your sex drive. PC exercise can even decrease performance issues. Try doing a set of 10 quick pulses and 20 longer holds.

Address Relationship Problems
Most of the men I work with expect their sex drives to function independently from everything else going on in their lives. As you’ve probably already guessed, that’s simply not how it works. Tons of different factors affect your sex drive, including what’s going on in your relationship (if you’re in one).

If you and your partner have been arguing or have unresolved issues, your sex drive is going to be negatively impacted. Addressing relationship issues can be as simple as having more communication, or as complex as starting couples counseling. Remember: While it may be awkward in the short term, better communication is key to healthy long-term relationships.

Make the Time for Sex
This is another suggestion that most people don’t ever think about! If you don’t have the time in your busy day to even have sex in the first place, your body likely won’t desire it. Fortunately, it can be really fun to work together with your partnerto create more space in your lives for intimacy.

Have Better Sex
So few people make the connection between the desire for sex and the quality of the sex you do have. If you’re not having great sex, it doesn’t make much sense to crave it! If your sex drive feels low, ask yourself, “Do I have crave-able sex?” If it doesn’t, then you have some really fun homework ahead of you!