Women’s Health Magazine asked a licensed psychologist Lauren Napolitano to tackle a question posed on Reddit. One user “self.sex” was worried that continued use of her vibrator had made sex with her boyfriend less fun than masturbation. She wanted to know whether sex toys gave an unfair advantage and could be considered unnatural. Read on to find out more …
Are orgasms with sex toys more powerful? It isn’t uncommon for people to go to Reddit to ask their embarrassing sex questions. One user, “self.sex” asked how come she never seems to experience as powerful an orgasm during sex with her boyfriend as when using her vibrator.
Do vibrators create an unfair advantage? “self.sex” wrote that she believed she may have spoiled herself ad now could no longer have the kind of orgasm during sex that she was able to accomplish while masturbating. She also asked fellow Reddit users whether they believed that vibrators provided an unfair advantage that wasn’t natural.
You know what you like User “strawbrysundee” answered that they thought it unsurprising that person would know exactly what turns them on and which buttons when pressed, would produce a great orgasm. They suggested she learn to communicate her wants to her partner and teach him what she likes.
Some women can only climax with clitoral stimulation User “Evil_K” said that she was one of those women who finds it impossible to reach climax without clitoral stimulation. She said that she also adds a vibrator to the mix during intercourse to ensure her satisfaction.
Stop with the vibrator already. “Berlchicken” disagreed, however, and suggested that “self.sex” stop using the vibrator for self-pleasure and enjoy sex with her boyfriend.
An expert answer. Women’s Health Magazine picked up the Reddit thread and decided that the question was one that women would want an answer to whether they were on Reddit or not. They asked an expert to provide an answer to “self.sex”’ s question.
Sex toys do have an unfair advantage. Lauren Napolitano, a licensed psychologist from Pennsylvania and author of the book “Over-Scheduled & Under-Sexed” How Busyness is Destroying Your Marriage,” tackled the question that posed on Reddit. Her opinion sex toys do have an unfair advantage in the bedroom because they have been “specifically designed to get you off!”
Your partner isn’t a machine. Your partner doesn’t come with batteries and a range of sensations, says Napolitano, and his appendages like his “tongue, finger or penis” cannot match up to the “precision of a machine.” She admits that orgasms courtesy of sex toys are often “intense and powerful.”
Sex toys give you control over orgasms One of the reasons they are “intense and powerful,” she explains, is because the sex toy gives you control over your orgasm. All the same, she recommends that women like “self.sex” should stop using their toys for a while to allow their bodies to relearn how to get “stimulated and excited” by their partners instead.
Natural orgasms are about vulnerability. Napolitano says that while the orgasms produced by the use of sex toys may be considered explosive, the ones experienced as a result of intercourse have the same quality albeit in a different way. She says that these orgasms represent your ability to open up both physically and emotionally to another person.
Try new positions. She said critical to continuing sexual enjoyment is the willingness to switch things up. Apart from switching off toys for a while, she recommends trying a variety of new positions and learning to communicate effectively.
Communication is critical. The more you communicate, says Napolitano, the better the sex between you and your partner will be. She says that when partners care about each other, nothing gives them more pleasure than ensuring they reach the peaks of sexual pleasure.
Don’t let your vibrator replace your partner. She stresses that there is nothing wrong with using a vibrator or other sex toys in the bedroom. She said the important thing though was to make sure that sex toys don’t replace your partner.
Think for two Women could consider sex toys that allow for stimulation of both partners while the sex toys like the bullet vibrator are small enough to be used during intercourse. If your partner isn’t so thrilled by the idea of toys in the bed, Napolitano suggests going shopping together for something that you both would like.
Invite him into your world. Women can coax their partners into the world of sex toys by showing them the benefits of a penis ring or teasing out what really turns him on. Maybe he’s into bondage, says Napolitano and would like a rope to dive into something new!
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