I’m A Feminist But I Like Being Called A Whore

Being a feminist doesn’t necessarily mean you have to go out and burn all of your bras or stop shaving. And it most certainly doesn’t mean that you’re not allowed to enjoy sex. Your sexuality doesn't have to adhere to your sociological beliefs, but we're sure that it influences them. Here, one woman anonymously writes that despite being a feminist, she enjoys being dominated in bed, and doesn’t think it makes her any less of a feminist.

What do you like to be called in bed? What are your thoughts on this? Share them with us in the comments below!

Feminist. An anonymous woman writes via Ravishly about how despite the fact that she’s a feminist who doesn’t agree with gender inequality and the objectification of women, but loves being called a whore in bed nonetheless.

Games. When having sex with her partner, she admits she enjoys playing a game she made up that involves her partner dominating her. While she gets off begin submissive, she can’t help but wonder why such an objectifying game makes her feel so good.

Crave. "This is a game I created, and one I crave. Why, as a self-respecting feminist, do I get so turned on by being a dirty little slut?” writes the anonymous woman, via Ravishly.

Perspective. She admits that not long ago, she did get offended every time a past lover would call her a whore while they were sleeping together, but eventually changed her perspective.

Desire. "But these days—while I remain just as staunchly feminist as ever—I no longer feel any inclination to push back against my desire to be ritualistically, explicitly, and sexually demeaned,” writes the anonymous woman.

Concerns. This isn’t to say that her newfound acceptance of being called a whore in bed didn’t come with a set of new concerns for her. Rather than being upset about being called a whore, she was upset that she enjoyed it.

Fantasy. "Like any good, thoughtful feminist, it makes me worry that I've internalized what 'society' has long told me about men and women; I'm concerned that even in fantasy, wanting to serve as nothing more than a vessel for male pleasure is an indication that I've become a self-loathing woman, mired in a fetish worthy of Freudian pursuits,” writes the woman.

Intimate. She goes on to explain why this game she plays with her partner and him calling her a whore makes her feel closer to him, and even makes the entire experience that much more romantic for her.

Equal. ”I don’t want to navigate how to be respectful and egalitarian in the bedroom; I want to be thrown down, spanked, and screamed at. Two partners in an equal position of power are good at settling chores, and at making love. But I think f****** requires a bit of a power imbalance—and sometimes I just want to be f*****,” writes the woman.

Fantasy. The point she’s trying to make, is that her time in the bedroom is completely separate from the time she spends living her everyday life, and sometimes it feels good to flip the switch and act her wildest fantasies in bed.

Respect. "In my own case, I happily understand the difference between fantasy and belief, and I know my partner does, too. So often after he calls me a dirty slut, and my convulsions have subsisted, he'll look me in the eyes and say, 'You know I love and respect you, right?'" continues the woman.

Feminist. The woman writes that her personal sexual fantasies don’t make her any less of a feminist, and that women who enjoy sex shouldn’t be seen as less.

Turn on. "I believe that ultimately, being a 'whore' doesn't make me anything more or less than a woman who enjoys sex, and who can serve herself in serving her partner,” she writes.

Empowering. If she’s gotten anything from changing her perspective on being called a whore in bed (aside from sexual pleasure), is further empowerment.

Freeing. "There's a subversion to it that feels freeing, coursing through my body until I am rendered both weak, and strong. In 'whore,' I've found both,” the woman writes, via Ravishly.